My due date was August 21st and as some may know Darien is one month old today, so we have to rewind a little bit to the weekend before he was born.
So as the story goes, that trip must have kick started my labor, because there were no other signs of anything going on.
Monday came and went as normal and then Monday night at midnight I turned over in bed and my water broke! For some people this is no surprise or nothing new, but for me it was both, with some nervousness, and I didn't know what to do feeling. I had never had my water break on it's own, and being three weeks early I was going crazy with thoughts of what do I do now, I don't have things ready, I didn't get maternity pictures taken, I hadn't packed my bag, I didn't have a maternity bra, I wanted to buy a different baby carrier, I had my scrabble wall to put up still, my house is a disaster! I didn't have a plan for the kids, am I going to have this baby in an hour? I'm suppose to have another ultrasound tomorrow, I should probably call and cancel, my bed is all wet now, I need to change the sheets and do laundry! The kids are sleeping, I don't want to wake them up. So I text my mom, and I knew as long as I wasn't contracting, I'd better get some sleep ;-) so she told me to let her know when something was happening. I got my bag packed, text my sister and then went back to bed :-)
Kyron had swim lessons at 9:00, so like any other day we got up, got ready for the day and took him, while packing all the hospital stuff in the van. We dropped Kyron off and then went to my Mom's to sit till he was done. I was feeling a contraction or so every few minutes, they were not strong at all and not close together. Nothing was really progressing, so I sat to put a puzzle together. Then my sister-in-law's mother came over and gave me a foot massage and told me to get bouncing on a birthing ball. So I did that till about 10:00 and finally called up to the family birth center to let them know what was going on. We made it there by 11:00 and the nurse got me all settled in and checked to see if my water had indeed broke. It did, and she measured me at only being 1 cm dilated. Slow moving for being three weeks early if you ask me! About an hour and a half went by as I walked the hall and waited for things to feel like they were progressing,
but nothing major... Around 12:30 my doctor told me I could order some lunch which made me happy since, I knew I wasn't allowed to eat once admitted and I hadn't eaten all day. So after my lunch I was only 3 cm, so they started Pitocin at a level 6, which was lower than the standard 9 starting off. I was still able to get up and walk around and by 2:30 my mom had showed up to see how things were going. I ended up getting in the tub for a little bit to see if that would help progress things a little, then I could feel my contractions getting stronger and closer together. For fear of having my baby in the bathroom like my sister, I got out of the tub and spent the rest of the time in bed. I knew it wouldn't be long now, but it did seem like this labor was taking forever, compared to my other two that were four and six hours. So anyway, as things progressed and the contractions got harder and more frequent I just could not wait for my baby to come. My husband and my mom were the only ones there for this birth which was a change for me, since for Kyron's birth I had my mom, sister, best friend, best friend's sister and my husband in the room, and for Sarin's birth my mom, dad, husband, aunt and cousin were there. It was a quiet crowd this time, but I think that was good.
I was feeling a lot of pressure and knowing that usually only means one thing I told the nurse, and she checked me, and then while walking out of the room told me not to push, she was going to get the doctor. I was ready to go and the doctor wasn't! AH, so I concentrated on my breathing instead of pushing until the doctor showed up, (not even 5 minutes later) I told her to hurry because I needed to push! She told me to just hang on, which was easy when I wasn't contracting, but when that next contraction started there was no holding on! She was ready and so was this baby, his head came in one push and the next push his body. She placed him on my stomach and he was just so tiny!! He was out and I was so incredibly thankful it was finally over, or so I thought...
Unbeknown to me the birth was the easy part, because as the nurses tended to my newborn son and gave him to daddy, the doctor worked on me to get the placenta out. But it didn't seem to want to come out all together in one piece. I had what is called a retained placenta. After several minutes of pushing on my stomach, she had to go in and pull the rest out piece by piece, so up she went all the way into the uterus. It was more painful than giving birth. I would described it as giving birth, over and over and over and over again, with no end in sight! After a while she said if she didn't get it all out they would have to operate. At that time I just asked to stop so I could just pray for a minute. It helped regain my composure from being emotional because it was so painful and I thought I was suppose to be relieved! I just had a baby, I was suppose to be holding him and crying because he was perfect, not because I wish I didn't just give birth... The whole process took 40 minutes and she ended up getting it all, Praise the LORD, so they didn't have to operate. Having my mom there was an extreme life saver, encouragement and support to me.
So after all the drama, our son was finally here, three weeks early. Darien Mark Doerrler born at 4:58pm weighing 5lbs 4oz and 18.5in long.
Throughout our stay at the hospital because he was premature by technically two days (37 weeks is term) he had to have his blood sugar checked before every feeding. He was so small and I have a larger chest it was difficult to breastfeed him, he gets tired out and falls asleep easily.
We got home Thursday afternoon and settled in. Saturday morning we had an appointment with the lactation consultant and he got weighed. He went down to 4lbs 8oz, and had his bilirubin level checked. Before we got the results we had left to go to Mark's family reunion out as his parents house. About 10 minutes after we got there the doctor had called to let us know his bilirubin levels were too high and she wanted him on a bili blanket to see if that would help it go down. So I went home with the blanket and my tinier baby. Another appointment Sunday morning with another bili check and it was about the same, but his weight went up to 4lbs 12oz, so that was good. One more appointment Monday morning to find out his levels had gone up! So he had to be admitted into the hospital to be put under lights to help it go down.
So far we've been adjusting, Mark has been back at work since a week after we got home, and has been on vacation this past week :-) Darien is still small and obviously I'm still big, so the combo isn't the greatest, but we've been working on it as I pump and he'll drink from a bottle, but has a hard time keeping it down. He's been breastfeeding more, but it's a work in progress.
Just when I thought things were going well and we were going to have a nice vacation to get away for a while, my milk supply hit a low point, during this last week, as I was not in my normal routine, and Darien seemed to want to eat more often. The last day of our vacation was emotional and frustrating as I ran out of my milk supply, I wasn't pumping enough and he wasn't taking me...I didn't know what to do. We left and I bought some formula on the way home and had to give him a bottle of it. We got home and then it happened. A fever...
I took Darien out of his seat when we got home to feed him and he was extremely warm, 100.1 read on the thermometer so I put a cold wash cloth on his forehead, but he didn't want to eat. His temp went down a little to 99.9 and then we went to bed at about 11:30 and he wanted to eat. Things were looking up...until he woke up again at about 1:00am he was warm again, 100.6. Reading that 100.4 is the technically temp for a fever, and he was under 3 months, it was a medical emergency so I took him to the ER.
We spent six hours in the ER, he got a urine test, a blood test, and a lumbar puncture to test for meningitis but they couldn't get any fluid out, so he had to have a radiologist do another spinal tap under an x-ray. Then he had to have an IV put in his foot for the antibiotics. They were going to treat him for meningitis in case he did actually have it, but wouldn't know anything for 48 hours which is the amount of time he needed to be admitted.
They did weight him when we got up to the room and he gained a little weight, so he is 5lbs 11oz and he grew two inches!! 20.5in so again, he's doing good, but a little slow on the weight gain. Constant feedings are necessary and supplementing with formula is on the horizon until I get home and can get my supply back up to speed. I am doing all I can, but it's still so hard thinking that it's not enough. It has been even harder since my mom is still up north on vacation, and she's a huge support for me.
My grandma ended up coming and visit, and stayed with Darien so I could go home and get a shower, and Kyron had orientation for school, so we went and did that quick and I picked up some more milk and an overnight bag.
He spiked another fever last night and that was a cause for concern, so he was put on triple antibiotics and then his fever went down on it's own! :-) Then his IV was clogged before we went to bed, so they had to take it out and find a new vein to poke. We didn't get to bed till 1:30am about 24 hours I'd been awake with only a few naps. Sleep was necessary!! As much as I could sleep I've been dosing off all day, but he's been doing great, and he looks really good.
The Doctor came in today to let us know that his cultures came back negative and she doesn't believe he has meningitis, but they won't be 100% sure till tomorrow when the 48 hours passes. She thinks it could just be a virus he got a week or two before from someone else who was sick.
Light at the end of the tunnel? Man I hope so! God has really been testing me with this child, to rely on him and reminding me I'm not in control. I'm glad I have him to lean on in hard times and he is always looking out for us. It's been hard, life isn't perfect, but I hope it gets better and Darien gets bigger and starts breastfeeding from me again, so if anyone wants to pray for that, I would appreciate it! Hopefully we'll be home tomorrow and we can get ready for school starting and get back into a routine. Thanks for reading, if you have any advice or experiences you want to share please feel free.
